Thinking back on this year, it almost feels like I’ve failed on a lot. I left the Royal Navy, I got myself into a toxic emotionally abusive relationship that destroyed me, and in turn with both of these things happening, my mental health deteriorated and honestly, without my friends, who stayed up until god knows what time in the morning during the Summer months, talking me out of suicidal tendencies, I don’t think I would have made it this far. I honestly don’t even think I’d be writing this.. they truly are a godsend.
I also pretty much failed at Blogmas because everything got on top of me.. but we won’t talk about that! I’ve learn’t now, that for next year, I’ll have to schedule my posts rather than write them on the day that they’re supposed to be posted!
It seems to me like I’ve failed at this year, but thinking into it.. I don’t think I’ve actually dramatically failed at all. If anything, I haven’t failed but I’ve learnt.
I’ve learnt just how much I loved the Royal Navy and just how much I can’t wait to go back in the future. I’ve learnt never to get myself into that position with someone again, and in fact, I’ve met someone who is simply amazing and well.. we’ll see how that goes with them!
And in terms of my mental health.. honestly.. It’s never been better. I can’t remember the last time I cried or wanted to self inflict any kind of pain, or anything in those terms, and as well as myself that I have to thank for that, I also have my family and my friends to thank for that. I could not have got through this past 6 – 8 months without them.
“Failure is only the opportunity to begin again, only this time, more wisely” – Henry Ford
I’ve also decided that I’m going to post a lot more on this blog, but we’ll see how that goes! I’ve already got a few ideas lined up, so stay tuned!